Are you a people pleaser?
Mind racing over the never-ending to-do list? Worried about what others may think? Struggle to say ‘no’. People pleasing is a common trait in teachers leaving them overwhelmed, exhausted, and burnt out.
I used to be the same until I understood ‘why’ I was always saying ‘yes’ to things when I actually just wanted to go home and rest.
It feels awful
I get it. You like helping people. It feels wrong not to help if you know how to but then you find yourself going home to your family feeling irritable and snappy. Why can’t people just leave you alone and stop asking for things?
In truth, we teach people how to treat us. The more we do for others the more they expect us to do things. This is where boundaries come into place but more importantly, deciding who we are, what we want, and being willing to receive it.
I always felt like I was being taken advantage of
Sure I had said yes to all these projects and responsibilities and I loved that people thought I was good enough to do them but in truth, I was drowning. I felt overworked and underpaid.
Working 60-plus hours a week was taking its toll on me. My house was a mess, I couldn’t remember the last time I did something for myself, and being present with my family was non-existent. I would just sit there trying to watch a film or listen with the urge to get up and get on with some more work.
Although I knew I didn’t want this anymore I felt stuck. Everything needed to be done and if I didn’t do it then who would? It all felt necessary. I was losing my confidence, questioning whether I was good enough, and thinking everyone must be better than me.
Until I made a conscious decision to find people who had what I wanted and mirror them. What if I could practice what they were doing? What if instead of staying silent I could find my voice and feel confident about saying what I wanted and needed? I read countless books on human behaviour, hired a self-sabotage coach, and jumped in.
Imagine if you could confidently have your voice and create the work-life balance you desire to fall in love with teaching and life again
Nowadays I play by my rules. I can let go of people and things that no longer serve me. I choose how much I do or don’t put into things and guess what I don’t worry about it either. Why, because I now know how to listen to my needs and communicate them clearly. I am proud of myself but above all, I can support myself no matter what happens. One of my biggest breakthroughs is that I can now argue back instead of going home to a restless night of worrying and overthinking!
Wouldn’t it be great to be able to say ‘no’ to an extra after-school club, to say ‘no’ to an extra subject lead title you really don’t have time for or even to say ‘no’ to the next new initiative?
Sounds like a rebellion but really it is about learning how to listen and communicate your needs clearly whilst supporting yourself and I’ve collated everything I did into bitesize strategies to save you time.
Hi, I’m Annabel.
Nice to ‘meet’ you. Over the past few years, I have helped hundreds of teachers reduce overwhelm, stop overthinking, and avoid and recover from burnout through work-life balance coaching and holistic health support.
What I learned through overcoming burnout and coaching clients to do the same was that most teacher well-being programs take up a lot of time and don’t focus on lifelong results. They are not person-centred but rather one size fits all leading to short-term fixes rather than an improved overall health and wellbeing.
It is my aim to coach teachers to better understand themselves and their own personal needs at any given moment. Providing long-lasting results and clarity so that no matter how busy life gets you can switch off without guilt and enjoy a work-life balance.
In this step-by-step guide, I am going to give you the strategies to help build your confidence to set your boundaries and stick to them and no, this is not another thing for your to-do list. The strategies we give you apply in your everyday life. Just 15 minutes a day to read the task and ‘hey presto’ all you need to do is lean in and give them a go.
Ready to discover how to say ‘no’ and stop people pleasing?
Then click ‘view course’ now and if you are not satisfied within 7 days that it’s for you then simply drop us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and we will give you a full refund.